Worrying About Weight

March 31, 2010 § 5 Comments

This is a heady post for me and one of those that I’m tempted to delete before I even get started.

But what keeps me writing is that I know I am not alone in this issue.  This is for anyone who has struggled with their own weight issues (over or under) and have children currently dealing with them.

For a little perspective…here is a picture that best reflects what I look like now.

This was taken last May so it’s about a year old.  Add a little bit under the chin and few inches to the hair and that’s what I look like today.  Sure, I won’t win any beauty contests but I’m still kinda cute.

Here’s what I looked like in 2003 and I’m not proud of it so please be kind…

and

Egads!  Emaciated only begins to describe it and the worst part is, at the time, I really didn’t see it.

You know, for a long time I resented my sister for saying, “You look like you have aids.”  And though she could have been more tactful, in reality, she wasn’t so far off the mark to suggest I looked like I had some life threatening disease.

It wasn’t until I stepped on a scale and noticed I weighed only 108 lbs that I thought twice about it.  I weighed 112 when I was a scrawny 14 year old.  I weighed between 128 – 134 consistently my entire adult life, even after two pregnancies.

I never had to worry about my weight until then.  I readily bounced back to my regular figure and weight after both of my kids without any effort.  So what caused the drastic weight loss?  The only thing that comes to mind is that I got braces and ate much less.

The truth is, I’m not sure what happened but after the braces came off  it wasn’t long before I put the weight back on and then some.  And now 7 years later, I could stand to lose a few (or twenty) pounds.

The point is, I have a daughter who is struggling with her own weight issues and I worry that my fretting over a few extra pounds might contribute to an unhealthy example.  And looking at pictures like that last one, I’m beginning to question whether or not I have set a good example thus far.

What I’ve tried to emphasize over the years is the importance of a healthy diet, regular exercise and investing in developing your mind and your soul.

I just want to be able to walk my talk so I help, rather than hinder, my daughter’s progress.

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More Than Ever Before

March 30, 2010 § 5 Comments

I’m writing things down
I’m taking notes and paying more attention

I’m blogging and jotting fervently
I’m taking stock and deliberating

More than ever before

I’m writing things down
Because I want a record of all this

All these thoughts, ideas and expressions
All these dreams and things I manage to make happen

More than ever before
I want a record of all this

Because time is fleeting and moving ever faster
And more than ever before I want a record of all this

Toiling, Taxes and Tired

March 29, 2010 § 8 Comments

First, I’ve been toiling in the fireplace room (it’s probably simpler to call it a den but our kids had no idea what that was when we bought the house so when referencing it that’s just what we called it and it stuck) getting ready to deconstruct it.

I’ve got a corner yet to clean out, paneling to remove, a wall to assess and maybe replace, a hole to fix, nail holes to fill, paint to apply and a carpet to clean.  But true to form, I have a list…

And yes, I did the list AFTER I finished the first four things on it just so I could cross them off.  ( 😉  Colleen)  Anyway, I’m hoping to have it all done by the end of April.  Wish me luck!

Next it’s taxes…I’m tempted to whinge a little here but I won’t.  Despite what a pain it is to look for, sort through and organize our receipts, we do have an accountant friend who does our taxes for free.  Still, I spent the better part of the morning just organizing our shopping tickets.

Tomorrow it’s the big stuff like T4’s, charitable contributions, investments and contracted repairs and upgrades.  Yeah, being a grown up is so coooool.  (sigh)

Finally, it’s tired.  And no I don’t mean me, I’m actually doing quite well on the energy level front.  But I suppose being laid up and bored out of your mind for nearly a month will do that to a person.  I’m talking about Rosie…

I caught her in mid-stretch.  She was  sleeping soundly until I walked up to her and pointed my camera at her.  Poor thing was stuck outside all night in the rain.  She didn’t come in when Hubby shouted last call around 11:00 pm.  She must have been counting on me having a bout of insomnia and checking the door at 2:00 am.

Too bad for her I slept soundly through the night.

Sunday Share

March 28, 2010 § 8 Comments

My contribution to Cate @ Moments of Whimsy ‘s weekly Sunday Share.

While Cate waxed poetic about the beauty of Autumn, because she’s on the other side of the globe in New Zealand, I’m here in Eastern Canada where we are experiencing a record breaking, way above seasonal temperatures, God-it’s-good-to-be-alive Spring.

And how am I celebrating this monumental occasion?  Well, after just basking in the warmth and reveling in the too much time on my hands, I’ve finally begun…


Spring Cleaning!

What?!  You don’t find spring cleaning inspirational?  Okay, honestly, I never used to either.  For most of my adult life I experienced it as a tedious chore.  I mean keeping house, especially once teenagers enter the picture, is an every day, ongoing, relentless and repetitive series of tasks.  And while not difficult, they are mind numbingly BORING!

Dishes, laundry, sweeping, vacuuming, dusting, picking up and putting away…need I go on?

But in the last couple of years I’ve begun to appreciate what a full on scrub down, a top to bottom de-webbing and an every room uncluttering can really do for your soul.

What I’d Rather Be Doing

March 27, 2010 § 3 Comments

The boxes pile up but not put away
The papers get shuffled but still lie astray

The dust gets lifted and then floats back down
To actually cleaning it up, I’ll get around

But in the meantime I’m finding myself
Living out what I’d rather be doing

I’m doing more knitting, I’m reading more books
I’m watching t.v. shows about gardening and how to cook

I’m doing my nails and keeping them neat
I’m doing crosswords until they’re complete

The lists get longer and more gets undone
While I’m doing nothing but sitting in the sun

Still I really kind of like this
Living out what I’d rather be doing

Unschooling and Helicopter Parenting

March 26, 2010 § 6 Comments

Child’s Play wrote an excellent post about how unschooling has helped her be less of a helicopter parent. I highly recommend you check it out.  It’s a great read and her pics are some of the best out there.

I have to admit that I related to this post a little more than I wanted to. I even felt a nagging, “Pay attention to this!”

The truth is I STILL helicopter way more than I should. Yes, my kids are 21 and 14, the oldest doesn’t even live at home anymore. But on too many an occasion I still whirr my Mommy blades so fiercely you’d think I was trying to spin time backwards.

In a way, I think that’s exactly what I’m trying to do, or at least just stop time long enough to catch my breath. You’re how old now?

I know that the reason I have parented this way is because I had such a rough time as a kid. I know I’ve been way over compensating and for the longest time I truly believed that my constant protection was in their best interest.

When my kids were in school I was on the PTA, I was a classroom helper, I chaperoned field trips, I delivered milk to classrooms and I was even on and eventually made head of the “lice squad”. (pun intended)

When my kids were in school I also sat on the local community council, I co-directed and taught a children’s drama program – that they participated in – and served on several committees that organized neighbourhood events.

I was involved in virtually every aspect of their lives give or take a few classes here and there and outings with friends that didn’t happen at our place.  I was, for most of their lives, the epitome of the helicopter parent.

The thing that was lost on me was to balance that need to protect and nurture with trust. Not just trust in myself to be able to handle something bad happening to my kids, but more importantly, trusting my kids to be able to handle something bad happening to them.

Because life is not all sunshine and roses and Mommy can’t really be there every minute of the day.  But oh how I tried.

What does any of this have to do with unschooling?  Well, it has everything to do with it.

Unschooling has afforded me that balance. Unschooling has allowed me to let go of the need to control and worry about every detail of my kids’ lives.  Unschooling has given me permission to be myself and incidentally, I’m much more easy going than I ever thought I was.

And I’m learning and practicing to be a more trusting and supportive resource as opposed to a stifling helicopter parent.  Unschooling is not just about our kids, it’s about us too.

While I wish very much I had come upon this kind of sharing of wisdom two decades ago, I’m deeply grateful for it now.

If unschooling has taught me anything, it’s that there are no time limits on learning.

It’s Early Spring Again

March 26, 2010 § 5 Comments

Last week’s beautiful and sunny 16 C  (60 F)  has fallen, with a vengeance, back to seasonal temperatures.  *SIGH*

It dropped down to -15 C  (5 F)  last night and is not expected to make it above zero today.  That’ll put a chill in your knickers for sure.  Not to mention make the body ripe to catch whatever nasty viruses that are circulating.  I’m so glad I hesitated when I thought of moving my clothes racks outside.

Underwearcicles anyone?

Other than that, things are going nicely.  My shoulder is a world better and aside from an occassional twinge, I’ve regained full range and mobility.  Thank God for small miracles.

Daughter starts a new class in a few weeks, Acting for T.V. and Film (following in Mom’s footsteps…too cool – let’s just hope she does more with it than I did – not that I didn’t love teaching) and she’s so keen.

It’s actually quite amazing to watch her perform.  You would never really know she had it in her if you’d never seen her in action.  Normally she comes across as being socially insecure and painfully shy and that wouldn’t necessarily be an inaccurate assessment.

But give her some lines to memorize, slap a costume or wig on her and boom she’s like Ethel Merman reborn…well, without the singing…that she’s still very shy about.  Still, the first time I saw her on stage in a full production I hardly recognized my own flesh and blood.

There she stood so confident and self-assured, belting out her lines perfectly to the very back of the room.  As her drama teacher I was impressed and even a little surprised (I honestly thought that despite how well she did in rehearsals that she’d choke come opening night – that’s not harsh, it’s reality because almost every kid I’ve ever taught did and only a handful didn’t), as her Mother I was as proud as punch and moved to tears.

Anyway, she’s excited and what’s more is that the timing and location of the class make it perfect for Hubby and I to have a date while she’s there.  So, for the next three months we’ll have a regular, weekly date night.

Yay!

Have a great weekend all!

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