“Uh, do you have condoms?”
November 23, 2010 § 7 Comments
And yes, just like that, I threw myself into the fire of parenting a young adult male…who is incidentally still living at home.
Now there’s incentive to finally get out on your own eh? It’s bad enough I check after him when it’s his laundry day, maybe this will finally light the flame of independence.
His response was nothing short of mortified…”Mom????!!!!”
I made no bones…
Me: What? You’re going to a young woman’s apartment, in the evening, you’re cooking dinner for her and then are planning to watch a movie, right?
Me: (slapping my forehead) Okay, be coy all you want. I’m just saying I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you take precautions is all. As much as I am looking forward to being a Grandma, I’m hoping for another few years yet before I have to start knitting booties.
Me: (channeling Sophia Petrillo from Golden Girls) Picture it! 1987, this very city. Your father and I were teenagers shacking up in a world gone mad…okay, not really. Still, there I was a young girl of 16 and I met your father…
Son: Okay, I get it! Please stop.
Me: Seriously dude…(yes, I actually talk like that) when I was your age I was mere months away from getting pregnant with your sister. You were already 6 years old. I’m just sayin’.
Son: Fine, I’ll stop and pick some up.
And that was that. I jumped back out of the fire and have since gone about my business as though I weren’t a bit singed on the edges.
Truth is, I don’t know if he actually did or not…pick up any condoms. I also don’t know if he needed any. He came home about 2:00 the next morning and since then I’ve managed to resist the urge to interrogate him.
It’s a fine line I’m walking these days, parent wise. Just when I think I’ve gotten the hang of this balancing act…they go and tighten the rope on me.