Project 2011 – Week Twelve

March 24, 2011 § 6 Comments

As always, much thanks go to Cate @ Moments of Whimsy for hosting Project 2011 and for being the glue that is holding us all together.  😀

This week though, I want to deviate a little from my goals.  Hubby has just returned from a ten day business trip.  Being as it was the longest he’s been away in our entire marriage and that I was doing double duty in every respect, needless to say, I found it difficult to think about my own personal goals.

However, it has come up a few times during the week that some single friends have said, “You’re so lucky to have Hubby.”  Immediately I was struck by the irony that they would offer such an observation while he wasn’t actually around.

And though I do feel fortunate to be married to such a wonderful man, I do get a little irked by the implication that a solid 16 year marriage just somehow got printed out like an instant lotto ticket.

A happy marriage is a choice that is made every single day, sometimes every hour and minute.  There is a lot involved in sustaining a marriage, even more in making it thrive.  Patience, tolerance, understanding, communication, forgiveness, honesty and openess.  Luck has nothing to do with it.

Too many single, never been married, women believe in a Cinderella scenario.  They think that their Prince Charming and happily ever after will come with no assembly required.  When things go wrong, instead of trying to change themselves and/or the situation, they just try to exchange the Prince.

And call those of us willing to trust, believe in and attempt to work things out with a man, lucky.

Does that sound bitter?

§ 6 Responses to Project 2011 – Week Twelve

  • Bernie says:

    I would have been one of those single girls who would say that to you. I haven’t even been married a year yet and I’m 41.

    Before I was married, I thought a husband was a magic bullet too. He was always there. He would be there to do whatever, blah, blah.

    Now that I’m married, he’s always here. *lol* e all want something we don’t have. And until one is married, they don’t realize a husband it not the end all be all of a wife’s existence.

  • Shady Lady says:

    Sheri, that was absolutely beautiful and spot on! Although, I have to admit…I say to LK, “How did I get so lucky?” Of course, I know it has nothing to do with luck. Yes, we work hard, too. Really great post!!!

  • Sheri says:

    Bernie – I didn’t mean to make sweeping generalization…sorry. Actually, the post was in reference to two specific women in my life. They haven’t made the best decisions when it comes to men and they often point out to me how “lucky” I am. In this case, while Hubby was away, it got under my skin. 😀

    BTW, Congratulations on being a newlywed. 😀

    Shady – Thanks. And yeah, I often tell myself I am lucky too and for the most part it doesn’t usually bother me when it’s said to me. It just struck a nerve this time. 😀

  • Cate says:

    Sheri – I absolutely understand and agree with you. A strong-willed Aussie girl and a hard headed Australian-Italian don’t last 22 years without committing to see things through despite the crap and stuff that life throws at you.

    Marriage is 100% a decision to commit to every day.

  • Sheri says:

    Thanks Cate. And you said it perfectly with, “Marriage is 100% a decision to commit to every day.”

  • […] 29th, 2011 § Leave a Comment Last week I wrote a post about how a happy marriage takes work, commitment, patience, forgiveness and isn’t just a matter of […]

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